The "Meaning" behind the Cookies!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! This is completely about venting! Just warning all my readers!

SETTING THE SCENE:
So, Monday night, I am feverishly baking off dozens of cookies for Valentine's Day. I bag some of them for friends at the gym, work, my husband & his friend's family. I also put together little goodies for some of my friends kids! I do this from the bottom of my heart and that I enjoy doing this around certain holidays. I get to the gym in the morning and Deny is one of the guys that works there....his pushing late 60's....OLDER THAN MY FATHER!!!! I hand him a bag of cookies and a little goodie box for his grandson. I also brought in cookies for my other friends and their kids. I say, "Happy Valentine's Day" and off I go.

THE DRAMA:
After doing some cardio, I come downstairs and Deny and his wife are working out together. His wife is someone that has never really gone out of her way to be friendly DESPITE my SEVERAL attempts to engage in conversation with her. She said to me, "So Tonya, where are my cookies"? Thinking she's actually opening up after 2 1/2 years of me going there, I giggle and reply, "Deny's got a bag that he can share with you".
SHE: "Well, I would like to know why you just bring cookies in for the guys"
ME: "I don't, I also bring them in for some of their kids & the women that USE to come here that I knew, no longer do".
SHE: "Oh, I see" ( in a rather cynical tone)
ME: "Ellen, is there something you need to say about that"? (Realizing she's not being friendly or funny)
SHE: "Yes, I think it's weird that you only bring in cookies for the guys and not the women".
ME: "Well, part of it is that they actually talk with me, some are my friends and some are the core of people that are always here and none of the women currently coming, bother to carry any conversation other than a polite 'hello'".
SHE: "G, I wonder why".
ME: "I do this from my heart and I love all of my friends and making stuff that the kids will have fun eating".
SHE: "Well, I can see doing it for the kids but not for the guys".

At this point, I start to cry and I turned to walk away, in disbelief and HORRIFIED that this women was so enraged about a BAG OF COOKIES. Not to mention that my friend Deny sat there and said NOTHING! Grrrrrrrrrrrr!

GUYS DON'T LIKE IT WHEN GIRLS CRY:
So, I am trying to gather myself together and I walk into another room where my friends are and they see that I am crying. My friend Rick looks at me like he's scared to death, not knowing what to say or do. Scott said, "What is going on"? He seemed a little more experienced with tears than Rick. I debrief them on the drama and they were just as surprised as I was. I also told them that I had goodies for them and wanted to let them know that it was not an attempt to get into their pants!! :-D I got myself together and let out a little giggle as Rick continued to look scared & unsure of how to handle a "crying Tonya". He said he was thankful Scott was there because he didn't know what to do & that he was trying to hide behind the weight bar! If you knew him, it would make you giggle too.

THE NEXT DAY:
I went to the gym the following day and Deny lets out a testing-the-waters, "Goodmorning" as Leo raves about my cookies asking when would I be bringing in another batch. I said I would the next holiday but Mr. Deny would be going without. I then say to Deny:
ME: "I'm feeling a little unresolved about what happened here yesterday around the cookies".
DH: "Well, she wasn't speaking for herself, she was speaking for ALL the women here".
ME: "What??? What do you mean, all the women here"? (mind you there are not many that come consistently)
DH: "Well, Ellen has said something to me before and I told her to stop it"
ME: "Does she think I'm after her 65+ husband"????!!!
DH: "No, I don't think so".
ME: "Well, then what is it"?
DH: "Well, it's not just Ellen, there are other women who've come up to the counter and thought it was odd that you brought in cookies for the guys and none for the women".
ME: "I use to bring cookies in for Beth & Carmilla and they no longer come"
DH: "Well, I'm just telling you what I've heard them say. I know you and know you do it out of kindness and that you have hurt feelings".
ME: "I consider you to be a friend and as a friend, I would have thought you would have stomped that gossip out by saying something like: 'You know ladies, when Ellen and I had our kitchen renovated, Tonya baked cookies for 2 1/2 months and brought them to the Bread of Life because Ellen couldn't. You may have a certain opinion but she does it with no agenda".
DH: "I'm only telling you what I know their peception of it is".
ME: "Well, their perception doesn't change the fact that I will continue to be generous and loving as I've always been. If they would like to all sit around and speculate on the "so-called", MEANING BEHIND THE COOKIES, look for evidence to back their perception, that is their choice. The one thing that I do know, is that I do not have friends that throw me under the bus, just so you know where we stand".

SHARING:
So, I just want to THANK the people in my life that know me and love me for who I am. Those that acknowledge my cookies are generated from kindness/generosity. Those friends that I have, who KNOW that I'm NOT after their husbands'....I HAVE ONE OF MY OWN! :-) All of you whom I've baked for (male/female/kids) that see the cookies as "cookies" and no meaning behind it! I guess there are women who think that a way to a man's "pants" is baking cookies! I am sad for the friends these women have, that they could be judged in the same manner! With friends like that, who needs enemies???????????????????? So, those of you who have seen Seinfeld's episode with the "Soup Natzie"........I take the stand, Deny, "NO COOKIES FOR YOU"! :-)